Porsche's Movie Reviews Ep. 4 - "Godzilla 3D (2014)"


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I will start this by admitting that I love, absolutely love, scary movies. Anything horror, monster, Japanese psychological, slashed, and everything else. Monster movies have seem to dissipate over the recent years in favor of clever storytelling and reality visuals like "Cabin in the Woods" and "The Conjuring" respectively. So when I heard that Godzilla was coming back, sans Ferris Bueler, I was actually excited to see one of the roots of horror reborn. Add Walter White and the hot Olsen daughter (watch Oldboy with Brolin), and I was a bit more excited. I may sound like a tool, but I had wondered what they could include in this one that could distinguish itself from the P Diddy infiltrated trash of 1999.

The answer? F***Ing Mothra! Yeah baby! (who? Google it, youngin's)

This establish sort of early on so I am not really spoiling anything. We're thrust into the plot rather quickly - Heisenberg is a nuclear plant operator in an island off the coast of Japan, it goes haywire, and his wife is killed. His boy grows up to be an officer in the Marines, and ends up having to go bail his dad out for trespassing in the fallout zone. After a short awkward reunion, we finally meet Mothra, or as the government called if, Muto or whatever - it's a giant cockroach moth thing. Mothra. As Mothra terrorizes the world (it flies folks) we're treated to an overacted role played by the great Ken Watanabe, and he delivers his lines all way too seriously in this farce of an effort.

Godzilla doesn't actually enter the picture until almost 55 minutes into the film, and when he finally appears, it's both awesome and embarrassing. He looks like a CG version of the old Japanese films. Yes, giant body, small head. Godzilla lumbers around and wrecks more havoc. And then all of a sudden, we have two Mothras destroying Vegas, Hawaii, and the final showdown lies in San Francisco.

The subplots of Malcolm's dad and his estranged son, combined with that son and his wife and son, are what fuel the full moments between Godzilla and Mothra battles. The marine unrealistically benefits from international and interstate travel via random military vehicles with a minimal credential check. He simply says he's an EOD officer and the allow him to ride shotgun with a damn nuke. Whatever, filler for the climaxing battles.

All in all the film was fun, but to say I was a bit let-down wouldn't be an understatement. It could have been better. The 3D was more of a gimmick then an addition, with only a few scenes actually taking part.

I would recommend a matinee viewing, saving your money on the 3D for the extra treats you might need to satisfy some of the slower parts.
Don't get me wrong I still loved this review, but I also think your missing the point or the plot...it's GODZILLA for crying out loud...lol..no writing in the world is going to make it much better than what this movie was besides the original. It's just big campy fun! So well said, but allow me to retort.. Mothra was in the film, albeit for only a moment and practically in name only... watch the kids room as it pans across you see a terrarium/fishtank with a lid and something inside it, a cocoon? but the real sticker is what it's labeled....yup you guessed it MOTHRA!! So I don't think they envisioned the MUTOS to be Mothra.. Mothra is more moth like hence the name, the Mutos as you so eloquently put it are giant cockroaches. It was ver heavily speculated that it would have been RODAN the flying teryidactal thing.. but it turned out to be something new in fact it turned out to be two something news! but that aside the MUTOS were think skinned with the exoskeleton with really didn't resemble MOTHRA at all.. so I'm going to have to disagree with you on that and that is where we stop our disagreements, because otherwise I think you hit the nail on the head with this review.

You know I'm going to let you in on a little secret about myself. When I was a kid like 3 or 4ish I lived in a trailer park and after watching any GODZILLA movie I was always afraid of going down the dark hallway because I thought GODZILLA was going to come out and get me...lol....good times....
Life goal own all retail X-Box games. My collection: X-Box: 535, X-Box 360: 1204, One: 178
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Rodan is for the sequel next summer. :P

Thanks for the critique!
Originally Posted by porschephiliac
I just hope that don't do something stupid and put in GODZOOKIE!!!
Life goal own all retail X-Box games. My collection: X-Box: 535, X-Box 360: 1204, One: 178
Let us get to know you: I want to be on the spotlight 2.0 Join here to enter GTN's monthly Challenge: Challenge, What Challenge...

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